How to Deal with Resentment With Your Partner
by Tricia Howard 05/13/2019
The feeling of resentment can happen in a marriage when two people no longer communicate with one another about little issues in the home. This situation can spring up doubts in them, leaving them to wonder if they are still in love with their partner. The only effective way to deal with this is by confronting the problems and finding constructive ways to bring an end to them.
- Confront the Problem. Facing the problem will result in a temporary conflict. Go ahead and deal with it. However, most couples dread confronting issues, for fear of arousing conflict in the home. When you feel angry because of what your spouse did, instead of resenting your partner, why not talk about it? It is better you let it out and face the temporary conflict than allow it to fester into resentment.
- Talk About It. Talk to your partner about how you feel. Communication in this stage matters a lot. Listen to your partner’s concerns and feelings. Talking with them will help you with a way forward. If you both feel helpless to sort it out, then seek professional help. You might need to see a marriage counselor or a therapist who will mediate between you and your partner. In a situation whereby your partner refuses to seek professional help, that shouldn’t deter you from going either. Meeting with the counselor or therapist will guide you on how to solve the issues in your marriage.
- Letting Go. You need to forgive your partner for whatever he or she has done. This is what helps you to move over from a resentful partner to the loving partner you were. When you have forgiven your partner, finally let go of resentment. One common trick to let go is to know that whatever happened is now in the past and as thus, should stay in the past. They shouldn’t have any negative impact on what lies ahead.
- Final Solution. When you have forgiven your partner and have let go of resentment, find time for physical connection. Hug, cuddle, have sex. These activities and gestures help to forget about what has happened finally. Another way to revert to lovebirds is to have more alone time. Go on a picnic. Ride on a Ferris wheel. Behave just like high school lover birds. You will be surprised how the fire of passion can burn bright once again.
Resentment is like a match fire that can destroy a forest if left to persist. Don’t allow resentment in your relationship to escalate into something uncontrollable. Tackle it, once and for all. If you are currently going through bitterness with your partner, take the first step today – confront it now!